Losowe angielskie dowcipy
Vultures and Mothers In Law ->
What is the difference between a vulture and your mother-in-law? Vultures wait until your dead to pick on you.... [cały ->]
What Am I Doing? ->
The brash young gynecologist, fresh out of medical school, took one look at his voluptuous new patient and abandoned his professional ethics entirely. As he stroked the supple skin of her naked body, he asked, "Do you understand what I am doing?" ... [cały ->]
God being a man ->
Q: How do we know that God is a man? A: Because if God was a woman, sperm would taste like chocolate.... [cały ->]
Movie Cliches ->
Herewith is a compendium of movie clich?s, stereotypes, obligatory scenes, hackneyed formulas, shopworn conventions and outdated archetypes. The author says that as you go to enough different movies, you start to notice things. Like how every tim... [cały ->]
The Missing Toupee! ->
On a senior citizen bus tour, the driver was surprised. While the passengers were unloading to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in his ear, "Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!" The driver didn't think much o... [cały ->]
Wedding ->
She offered her honor, He honored her offer, And so all night long, it was on-her and off-er!... [cały ->]
How did you know? ->
A guy goes into a supermarket and buys: * one tin of beans * one bag of chips * one pack of burgers * one tub of ice cream * one cake * one case of beer * one pint of milk He takes them over to the checkout, and the girl looks at what he ha... [cały ->]
Fastest Thing In The World ->
There were 4 guys sitting in a bar. One of them decided to play a little game about what each of them thought was the fastest thing in the world. Well the first guy says, "I think a Concord Jet is the fastest thing in the world, because it can go ... [cały ->]
Athletic Sperm ->
Once upon a time in a place where little sperms grow, there was a super jock sperm who spent all his time working out. He did things like lifting weights and running, his most important duty. All the other sperm were very curious about his pastimes. ... [cały ->]
If a frog parks ->
Q. What happens when a forg parks illegaly? A. It gets toad!... [cały ->]
The Inventor... ->
This man goes along to the Patent Office with some of his new designs. He says to the clerk, "I'd like to register my new invention. It's a folding bottle." "OK," says the clerk. "What do you call it?" "A fottle, replies the inventor." "A fottl... [cały ->]
Chemistry's greatest achivement? ->
What is chemistry's greatest achievement ...... Artificial blondes!... [cały ->]
The great escape! ->
A brunette and a blonde were speeding down the street when they passed a cop. "Oh no!" cried the brunette. "Is he following me?" "Yep," replied the blonde. "I'm going to drive down this little side road, okay?" said the brunette. "Yep," replied... [cały ->]
Diet Rules ->
1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda. 3. When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if yo... [cały ->]
Chickens ->
Two chickens were talking and one chicken said to a the other chicken "who is your favorite music composer?" The second chicken responds "bach, bach, bach!"... [cały ->]